Jeffrey Eugenides’ vest has 217 followers and counting. The billowing brown garment, which is featured in the now infamous Times Square ad for The Marriage Plot, has a lot to say about its owner and is not above making a few serious threats. Case in point: on October 24th it wrote, “Jeff now says he’ll only wear me once every nine years. We’re now in talks with Joyce Carol Oates. Looking for a more prolific wearer.” Would it dare? In a tweet about film rights on November 4th, the vest had the audacity to proclaim: “Won’t be able to come out of the closet until my agent negotiates a rigid rider.” Sheesh.

Find more sartorially-minded tweets by the ego-driven waistcoat here.