July 25, 2013

Recipes inspired by our favorite 2 Chainz songs, in honor of 2 Chainz’ upcoming cookbook

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In a recent interview with radio station Power 105, the rapper Tauheed “2 Chainz” (fka “Tity Boi”) Epps confirmed that his next album, B.O.A.T.S II: Me Time, will be accompanied by a cookbook. 2 Chainz explained that the book will have 14 to 15 recipes (one per song), and:

“It’s gonna tell you what was used to make these, as far as ingredients and cooking times and all of that stuff… and probably the pros and the cons. I’m a seafood lover, I don’t eat beef or pork, period… So turkey, chicken, that’s a lot of the recipes I use and eat every day”

2 Chainz compared his dietary choices to those of an athlete. He says “I treat this rap like a sport, that’s my angle, so with the meals and all of that stuff, like… very few athletes eat fried food all day long… it’s just hard, it clogs up arteries…” Epps is very passionate about eating right, and he realizes that it’s not only a personal issue: “For black people, the leading cause of death is high blood pressure. All of that comes from what you eat. Yeah I eat salads.”

Melville House shares similar values with Chainz; we love words, we’re quirky, health conscious, and we make cookbooks. Okay, maybe those are weak links, but I decided it would be a good idea to use the information Epps has provided us, through interviews, lyrics and social media, to create a few recipes inspired by past songs. I tried to stay true to the rapper’s values while maintaining his signature “different-ness.” Bon appetit!

Yuck! Chili!
Song: “Yuck!” featuring Lil’ Wayne

Ingredients:
-Canned goods (whatever you’ve got lingering in the cupboard will do)
-Similac
-A meat rack
-Hot bologna
-Hot potato

As 2 Chainz raps on “Yuck!,” the opening track off his debut album Based On A T.R.U. Story, “Before Benihana it was canned goods / Before canned goods it was Similac…”

Most of us can relate; at one point or another, we’ve found ourselves staring into our refrigerators, the day before payday, asking “how can I make all of this work together?” 2 Chainz’ saving grace? This hearty chili.

Lil’ Wayne modification: drizzle in Codeine cough syrup liberally.

Latté Like Me
Song: “Like Me” featuring The Weeknd

Ingredients:
-Organic Canadian milk (it matters)
-Fair Trade espresso coffee beans
-Mustard, Ketchup
-CHESTNUT!

“I’m different!” touts Chainz in several of his songs. This is true even for the rapper’s preferred caffeinated beverage. “Like Me” is a confessional of sorts complete with the crooning of a certain Canadian (not Biebz), and laced with Tity Boi’s signature gourmet lines. Here is the Latté Like Me:

The Weeknd modification: pour out drink, replace with 1 part maple syrup, 8 parts Patron XO.

No Lime Guaca-holy-moly
Song: “No Lie” featuring Drake

Ingredients:
-9 or 10 avocados (no lie!)
-Olive oil
-Salt & pepper
-Red Onion
-Serrano chiles
-Lemon juice, no lime.
-Spinach (the frozen kind)

One of the biggest hits off of 2 Chainz’ debut album was his collaboration with yet another Canadian, Mr. Aubrey Graham himself, better known as Drake. Chainz’ take on guacamole drops the lime and adds spinach for a greener twist (inspired by the Popeye reference in the song).

Drake modification: only eat chicken nuggets, ever. And expensive champagne.

Dope Peddler’s “Different” Surf & Turf
Song: “Dope Peddler”

Ingredients:
-Lobster Tail
-A (Turkey) Fatburger
-Polar bear meat
-Olive oil
-Fine wine
-Worcestershire
-Lemon Juice
-Parsley
-Seafood seasoning
-Salt and pepper
-Garlic butter from the Benihana

“Fine wine and lobster tail… Pockets on Fatburger!” Walk into any fancy restaurant and they probably have a variation of this all-star land and sea dish. But Tauheed truly bridges the gap from cow (turkey, since we know 2 Chainz never eats pork or beef) to lobster with a delectable (albeit extremely illegal) land-roaming, sea-swimming creature fond of red-labeled sodas: the polar bear. A bit salty, a bit earthy, polar bear ribs go well with both the turf and the surf of the dish, though drowned in garlic butter (for your Benihana issues, see the song “Crack”), everything tastes the same. And by that I mean T.R.U.ly delicious.

Yams Everywhere! Birthday Cake
Song: “Birthday Song” featuring Kanye West

Ingredients:
-Yams
-Salt
-2 cups orange juice
-2 cups of brown sugar
-1 Teaspoon ground ginger
-1 Teaspoon cinnamon
-6 tbsp butter
-The best red velvet cake you can find

Most people know exactly what 2 Chainz wants for his birthday. But what kind of cake does he want?? I think we have the answer with this thick, creamy, golden brown, downright sinful dessert. Get ready to hit the kitchen with “yams everywhere!”

Kanye West modification: smash the cake on the floor, forbid any collaborators from eating while recording another ridiculously good album.

Feds Watching Feta Greek Salad
Song: “Feds Watching” Featuring Pharell Williams

Ingredients:
-Mixed greens
-1 hothouse cucumber
-1 red bell pepper
-1 yellow bell pepper
-1 pint cherry tomatoes
-1/2 red onion
-1/2 pound feta cheese
-1/2 cup kalamata olives, pitted
-2 garlic cloves
-1 teaspoon dried oregano
-1/2 teaspoon Dijon mustard
-1/4 cup red wine vinegar
-Salt and pepper
-1/2 cup olive oil
-Lobster

Julian Assange, Eric Snowden… 2 Chainz? Many rappers are probably laughing at all of the privileged people running around concerned about the NSA because, well, those rappers’ neighborhoods have had their telephone wires tapped and/or cut altogether since the glorious Reagan era… but that’s a conversation for a different day. Instead let’s focus on the resolve of Chainz and Williams; to ‘”look fresh as hell if the feds watching.” Part of that look involves eating fresh stuff, like salad and ice cream. NSA slime might nail Chainz for some other greens he enjoys, but all they can do is ogle this particular dish.

Pharell Williams modification: Julienne those peppers. Replace greens with romaine lettuce. Replace kalamata olives with top of the line Murat olives imported from Cyprus. Replace kosher salt with mediterranean sale marino. Garnish with perigord truffles. Fresh. As. Hell.

Love Beet Béchamel with F*ckin’ Portabellos!
Song: “F*ckin’ Problems” with A$AP Rocky, Drake and Kendrick Lamar

Ingredients:
-Beets
-Portabello Mushrooms
-Flour
-Salt
-White pepper
-2 tbsp butter
-1 cup heavy cream
-1/2 pint milk

This star studded song pays tribute to every rockstar’s biggest vice (if not drugs), women. The men of this song have no shame for their sex-obsessed lives, for better or worse. Regardless, they have taste when it comes to food, as this dish proves. (Fun fact, this recipe is quite similar to one found in Melville House’s own Duke’s Table!).

A$AP Rocky modification: Throw away 2 Chainz’ plates and replace with Alessi dinnerware.

Drake modification: order a Kid’s Meal for Drake.

Kendrick Lamar modification: This is good. As long as it’s followed by Fruity Pebbles and cartoons.

 

Jean-Patrick Grillet is an intern at Melville House.

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