The cover of London Mayor Boris Johnson's "Cultural Metropolis" report. Note the teeny tiny British people in and on the elephant --- yes, it's a Trojan elephant.

British people are very grumpy about a lot of things. It’s part of our charm. One thing we’re especially worked up about is the 2012 London Olympics: surveys keep showing that increasing numbers of us don’t want the Olympics, resent the enormous costs, spit about the forcible closing of small businesses and would be quite happy if they were given to Paris even at this late stage. We’re all too lazy to benefit from improved sports facilities and too cynical to believe that such facilities will be open to anyone other than the already sleek athletes who are supposed to represent us. Perhaps that’s why Boris Johnson has just announced a palliative three year plan to enhance arts and culture in London. The BBC reports on the paper published today, “Cultural Metropolis”, in which we are promised a series of events in 2009 to celebrate London’s history, a “London Film Day” and additional funding for the London Jazz Festival to enable performances in outer boroughs. Johnson says: “Art and culture are how civilisations define themselves. They are what we leave behind — or what we hope to leave behind.” So really, unless we want future generations to think we were ignorant jocks, even more should be spent on culture than the £9 billion that the Olympics are currently estimated to cost. Forgive my scepticism….